31 May 2010
25 May 2010
21 May 2010
- What your spouse/partner is going through
- What is your baby doing
- What changes will happen to your routine
- "How To's" your spouse/partner wishes you knew
- A man's pregnancy
20 May 2010
As your children shift into the school age and start interacting with children of the opposite gender, they will implement what they have learned at home about male-to-female relationships. Your children have been paying close attention to how you treat the other parent, your spouse.
If your relationship with your spouse has been shaky, your child will take that with them to school. What do I mean by shaky? Well, I mean that there is a lack of trust, little responsibility, and a lot of unnecessary time spent apart, your child will have a likely chance of seeking out relationship companions that are not trustworthy, don’t own up to responsibility, and are physically detached.
Let’s also think of if you have yelled or even threatened to hit your spouse. Even if you didn’t do this in front of your children, it still has an influence on them if they are present, say in their bedroom. If this is the case with your relationship with your spouse, your children, especially your daughters, will lean towards males who are verbally, emotionally, and physically abusive.
If your relationship has been following the “Gottman guidelines” of at least three positive acts for every one negative, your children will have noticed this. If you have been taking your spouse out on dates, buying them flowers, remembering your anniversary, among other things, your children will be more likely to seek out respectful partners.
Of course, there will be the situation where your child gets themselves into an unhealthy relationship, despite your example. Just know that you are their first exposure to a male-female relationship, and despite a poor choice, they will one day come to the realization and desire the relationship that their father and mother had.
We also need to be aware of other influences on the male-female relationship. One cannot omit the outside forces that come into our homes. What kind of shows and movies do you watch in your house, and how are women treated in them? What kinds of video games do you play, and how are the women treated or portrayed in those? How about your music, what do the lyrics contain about relationships? If you view pornography, think of how that will influence your daughter and son of how women should be treated by men. Take all of those into account. Even if you treat your spouse with the utmost respect, but then listen to a song demeaning your relationship to them, there will be a conflict in the messages you are sending to your children.
Make your home and your relationship with your spouse healthy, so that your children can see, hear, and learn how they should be treated. It will greatly affect her relationships for the rest of their life.
18 May 2010
17 May 2010
No! I am sure that was the answer that went through your head, and will continue running through your head until she turns 35.
Some of us have these societal defined ages in which it is okay to start dating: 14, 16, 18, 21, 25, and 30. There are times when a 16 year old is ready to date, and then there are times when a 21 year old is not ready to be dating. There are certain characteristics that are needed in order to start dating. Emotional maturity is the key indicator for dating preparedness.Emotional maturity can be broken into three categories empathy, self-control, and personal responsibility.
14 May 2010
13 May 2010
10 May 2010
Dancing with your daughter, no matter how bad of a dancer you are, is a great way to interact with her. It shows that you are willing to let go of yourself and are available to have fun with her. Think of the message that sends to her: “My daddy is willing to take time out of his day to dance, jump, and spin around with me.”
07 May 2010
03 May 2010
Mother’s day is coming up. We usually focus on getting mother a gift. Yet if we get mom a gift, and later disrespect her, that present has little value.
As I had written in an earlier post, your daughter learns about male-female relationships by watching how you treat your wife. However, you can also teach your daughter how to treat her mother.
The following are some ideas of how you can help your daughter show respect to her mother for the other 364 days of the year.